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What to Do When You Experience Gaslighting in an Indian Household

By PurpleGirl EditorsUpdated May 20266 min read

Reviewed by

Dr. Priya Sharma · MBBS, MD (Obstetrics & Gynaecology)

This is what many Indian women face when they experience gaslighting in their own households. Gaslighting in an Indian context can be particularly challenging due to the strong family bonds and the emphasis on maintaining harmony. You might find yourself in a situation where you're made to believe that you're overreacting or being too sensitive, and this can be devastating. It's essential to recognize the signs of gaslighting and take action to protect yourself. A lot of women in India struggle with this issue, especially when it comes to their in-laws or husbands. For instance, a woman from Mumbai might be told that she's imagining things when she expresses her concerns about her husband's behavior, or a woman from Delhi might be made to feel guilty for speaking up against her in-laws' constant criticism. Gaslighting can have severe effects on a person's mental health, including anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Therefore, it's crucial to address this issue and seek help when needed.

Community Advice Disclaimer: This guide is based on community experiences and lifestyle advice. It is not a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or legal advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare provider for personal diagnoses or treatments.

What You'll Need

  • emotional support from friends and family
  • access to counseling services
  • a safe and private space to express yourself
1

Recognize the Signs of Gaslighting in Your Indian Household

The first step in dealing with gaslighting is to recognize the signs. Gaslighting can be subtle, and it may not always be easy to identify. However, some common signs include being constantly questioned or criticized, being made to feel guilty or ashamed, and being told that you're overreacting or imagining things. In an Indian household, gaslighting can be even more challenging to recognize, as it may be disguised as 'concern' or 'care'. For example, your in-laws might constantly question your cooking skills, making you feel like you're not good enough, or your husband might make you feel guilty for spending time with your friends. It's essential to trust your instincts and listen to your inner voice. If you feel like something is off or that you're being manipulated, it's likely that you're experiencing gaslighting. You can check your symptoms to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.

2

Seek Support from Friends and Family Outside of Your Household

Having a support system outside of your household can be incredibly helpful when dealing with gaslighting. Talking to friends and family members who are not part of your household can provide you with a different perspective and help you feel less isolated. It's essential to choose people who are supportive and non-judgmental, as you need a safe space to express yourself. For instance, you might have a friend from college who is always there to listen, or a cousin who has gone through a similar experience. Don't be afraid to reach out to them and talk about what you're going through. You can also join a support group, either online or in-person, to connect with other women who have experienced gaslighting. This can be a great way to feel less alone and gain valuable insights from others who understand what you're going through. In India, there are many organizations that provide support to women who are experiencing domestic violence or emotional abuse, such as the National Commission for Women.

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3

Set Boundaries and Prioritize Self-Care

Setting boundaries and prioritizing self-care are crucial when dealing with gaslighting. It's essential to learn to say 'no' and set limits with your family members, especially if they're constantly criticizing or questioning you. This can be challenging, especially in an Indian context where family is highly valued, but it's necessary to protect your mental health. You can start by setting small boundaries, such as taking time for yourself each day or refusing to engage in conversations that make you feel belittled. Prioritizing self-care is also vital, as it can help you cope with the emotional stress of gaslighting. This can include activities such as meditation, yoga, or spending time in nature. In India, there are many resources available to help you prioritize self-care, such as yoga classes or meditation retreats. You can also try practicing mindfulness to help you stay grounded and focused. Optional tip: Consider seeking out a therapist who specializes in gaslighting or emotional abuse, as they can provide you with personalized guidance and support.

Consider seeking out a therapist who specializes in gaslighting or emotional abuse
Step 4

Document Incidents and Keep a Record

Documenting incidents and keeping a record can be incredibly helpful when dealing with gaslighting. This can include writing down specific events, conversations, or incidents that have made you feel manipulated or belittled. Keeping a record can help you track patterns and identify gaslighting behaviors, making it easier to seek help and support. You can use a journal or a note-taking app to document incidents, and make sure to include as much detail as possible. This can include dates, times, locations, and the people involved. In India, it's essential to keep your records private and secure, as you may not want your family members to know that you're documenting incidents. You can also use password-protected apps to keep your records safe. Additionally, you can learn more about emotional abuse to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.

5

Seek Professional Help and Support

Seeking professional help and support is essential when dealing with gaslighting. This can include talking to a therapist, counselor, or psychologist who specializes in gaslighting or emotional abuse. A professional can provide you with guidance, support, and resources to help you cope with the emotional stress of gaslighting. They can also help you develop strategies to deal with gaslighting behaviors and provide you with a safe and non-judgmental space to express yourself. In India, there are many resources available to help you seek professional help, such as the Indian Psychiatric Society. You can also use the period calculator to track your menstrual cycle and identify any changes that may be related to gaslighting. Additionally, you can learn more about anxiety and depression to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.

6

Create a Safety Plan and Prepare for the Worst

Creating a safety plan and preparing for the worst is essential when dealing with gaslighting. This can include having a safe place to stay, a support system, and a plan for emergency situations. It's essential to be prepared and have a plan in place in case the situation escalates or becomes too much to handle. You can start by identifying safe places to stay, such as a friend's or family member's home, and making sure you have a way to get there quickly. You can also prepare a bag with essential items, such as clothing, documents, and medication, in case you need to leave quickly. In India, there are many resources available to help you create a safety plan, such as the National Domestic Violence Helpline. You can also learn more about domestic violence to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.

PurpleGirl Insight

"Keeping a journal can be incredibly helpful in tracking instances of gaslighting, as it allows you to document specific events and emotions, making it easier to identify patterns and seek support."

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Frequently Asked Questions

What are the signs of gaslighting in an Indian household?
The signs of gaslighting in an Indian household can include being constantly questioned or criticized, being made to feel guilty or ashamed, and being told that you're overreacting or imagining things. It's essential to recognize these signs and seek help and support as soon as possible. You can [check your symptoms](/quiz/gaslighting-quiz) to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly. In India, gaslighting can be particularly challenging due to the strong family bonds and the emphasis on maintaining harmony, so it's essential to be aware of the signs and seek help when needed.
How can I deal with gaslighting from my in-laws?
Dealing with gaslighting from your in-laws can be challenging, but it's essential to set boundaries and prioritize self-care. You can start by setting small boundaries, such as taking time for yourself each day or refusing to engage in conversations that make you feel belittled. It's also essential to prioritize self-care, such as meditation, yoga, or spending time in nature. In India, there are many resources available to help you deal with gaslighting from your in-laws, such as counseling services or support groups. You can also [learn more about setting boundaries](/how-to/setting-boundaries) to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.
What is the impact of gaslighting on mental health?
The impact of gaslighting on mental health can be severe. Gaslighting can lead to anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, and even post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It's essential to seek help and support as soon as possible to mitigate the effects of gaslighting on mental health. In India, there are many resources available to help you deal with the impact of gaslighting on mental health, such as counseling services or support groups. You can also [learn more about anxiety and depression](/how-to/anxiety-and-depression) to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.
How can I support a friend who is experiencing gaslighting?
Supporting a friend who is experiencing gaslighting can be challenging, but it's essential to be there for them. You can start by listening to them and believing their story, as gaslighting can make them feel isolated and alone. It's also essential to encourage them to seek help and support, such as counseling services or support groups. In India, there are many resources available to help your friend deal with gaslighting, such as the [National Domestic Violence Helpline](https://www.ncw.nic.in/national-domestic-violence-helpline). You can also [learn more about supporting a friend](/how-to/supporting-a-friend) to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.
What are the laws and schemes in India that protect women from gaslighting and domestic violence?
In India, there are several laws and schemes that protect women from gaslighting and domestic violence. The [Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005](https://www.wcd.nic.in/act/protection-women-domestic-violence-act-2005), for example, provides protection to women from domestic violence, including emotional abuse and gaslighting. The [National Commission for Women](https://www.ncw.nic.in/) also provides support and resources to women who are experiencing domestic violence or gaslighting. Additionally, the [Beti Bachao Beti Padhao scheme](https://www.wcd.nic.in/scheme/beti-bachao-beti-padhao-scheme) aims to empower women and girls, and the [One Stop Centre scheme](https://www.wcd.nic.in/scheme/one-stop-centre-scheme) provides support and resources to women who are experiencing domestic violence or gaslighting. You can [learn more about these laws and schemes](/how-to/laws-and-schemes-for-women) to better understand what you're going through and seek help accordingly.
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