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How to Handle Microaggressions at Your Workplace as an Indian Woman

By PurpleGirl EditorsUpdated May 20262 min read

Reviewed by

PurpleGirl Editorial Team · Reviewed by experienced women writers & researchers

Have you ever walked away from a meeting feeling small because of a 'joke' about your accent, your food, or your ambition? You stand in front of the mirror, wondering if you are just being too sensitive or if you are imagining things. Let me tell you, Didi-to-Didi: You are not imagining it. Those 'little' comments are microaggressions, and they happen to the best of us. You don't have to stay silent, and you definitely don't have to lose your cool to be heard.

What You'll Need

  • A calm, steady breathing technique
  • A digital 'incident log' on your phone
  • Confidence in your professional value
  • One trusted mentor or colleague
1

Name the behavior immediately

When someone makes a backhanded comment, don't laugh it off to 'keep the peace.' Instead, use the 'curiosity' technique. Ask them, 'What did you mean by that?' or 'Can you explain why you said that?' Forcing them to explain their bias often makes them realize how inappropriate they sound without you having to start a fight.

💡 Tip:Keep your voice neutral and your face expressionless.
2

Document every single instance

Microaggressions are like drops of water; one doesn't hurt, but a bucket full can ruin your day. Keep a private note on your phone with the date, time, who said it, and what exactly was said. If this turns into a pattern of bullying or discrimination, you will have the evidence you need to go to HR.

Warning:Do not delete these notes; they are your proof if the situation escalates.

Have a specific question you can't ask anyone? Ask it anonymously. No name. No judgment.

Ask Here →
3

Find your 'Work Sister' circle

You don't have to carry this burden alone. Find one or two other women at work you trust. Share your experiences with them. Often, they might have noticed the same behavior or can offer a different perspective. Having an ally makes you feel less isolated and more confident in speaking up.

💡 Tip:Choose someone who listens without judging your feelings.
PurpleGirl Insight

"Your silence is often mistaken for agreement; a calm, direct response is your strongest tool for regaining respect."

Was this guide helpful?

Frequently Asked Questions

Am I just being too sensitive?
No. Microaggressions are designed to make you feel like you are overreacting. Trust your gut. If a comment made you feel uncomfortable or belittled, it was inappropriate, regardless of whether the other person intended it as a 'joke.'
Should I go to HR immediately?
HR is there to protect the company, so go to them only when you have a clear pattern of behavior documented. Before that, try setting a firm boundary with the person directly. If the behavior continues after you've spoken up, then it is time to involve HR.
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